Today I found myself struggling more than usual with the "atmosphere" at work. I e-mailed a close friend and started revealing to her and to myself how I truly felt...
"Dear friend:
I'm feeling a little like a yo-yo. I just found out, via general e-mail to all employees, that my job will continue on another month and a half, and not at the end of next week as planned. I think it's weird that I found this out along with the rest of the world and not before hand. You know, at work I always feel like I'm on a "need to know" basis. You'd think I'd get a little more information up front. It's like my input is neither needed nor wanted. Am I just being too sensitive? On the other hand, I think- whatever. The less I know the less I have to be responsible for. Thanks for letting me vent!"
She e-mailed me back and said:
"I'd feel the same way. You are at least, if not more, qualified to make decisions in your field than anyone else. I think that you at least should be in the "inner circle" of planning. I don't know if this is the usual way things are done or if it was different when the old boss was there. It's a moot point, I suppose, but I wonder how typical this situation is. Vent away!>>> "
And so I thought about it.
"Dear friend again:
I think you nailed it- my old boss sought input from little ole' me on anything pertaining to my job- even in designing the room that I work in and stuff. She made me feel valued and important, even when I started out and only worked 1 hr. /day. She also had this "anti-authority" attitude that I could totally relate to. Guidelines and policy were things to guide, not dictate how things were run. If we had a better idea, they were always welcomed and listened to. And if she didn't agree, she was considerate enough to say why. I didn't always agree with her, but it made disagreeing so much easier.
So, yeah, I've had a hard time adjusting- because it is sooooooooo different. I've seen some good things and positive changes come from my new boss, but I don't feel like a part of a team anymore, more like an, an employee. I think I feel appreciated, but not really valued.
But, truth to tell, it's par for the course. Any new change in leadership has it's adjustments. Even though things are being run well, it's hard to change over to a different "atmosphere". You said there's politics where your husband works. My husband said there's politics and complaints where he works. I realize anywhere you work is going to have it's flaws, no matter what. Besides the set backs, I still love the job."
And so, my dear blog friends, I put this situation before you. I want to love where I work, but I find myself feeling frustrated over probably insignificant things. Am I overly sensitive and should I just get over it? Do you have any solutions?
2 comments:
I almost wish we were ending next week. I was already mentally there. Is this the way the education biz is all the time? The ad game was cutthroat but at least I knew the bottom line was always $$$. Here, I'm not sure!
Hi Annette - I had a similar issue with my job. I have had the same supervisor for the last 9 years. He was very caring and involved in helping and supporting me as I grew into my position at work. He always looked to me for input, valued my thoughts and opinions on how we could improve things around R&D, and enabled me to tackle some pretty big project work throughout the past 9 years. Two months ago, he stepped down so that he could be a scientist again until he retires (he was tired of being the WW R&D director and wanted to do what his Ph.D. had trained him for). My new supervisor had a totally different attitude. He was impossible to work with, looked down on the women in R&D (I think it was a cultural thing, he is from South America). He didn't ask for our input, and if we gave it to him, he would look to the men in R&D to confirm whether what we were talking about was correct. He pretty much expected the women to nod, smile and get him coffee (even our Ph.D.s). The saddest part is, I don't think he was even aware of what he was doing. The drastic change in atmosphere brought me to a crossroads...should I continue in my job - just grin and bear it so to speak? I tried speaking with him about my concerns, but he really didn't understand. I decided to pursue other options and I quit my job. This was a huge change for me, but now I am very happily employed doing what I love (and telecommuting from home). This change took a lot of fasting, prayer and temple visits. Now, I am not suggesting you do that, it sounds like you have a pretty wonderful job - and I have seen you in action, you are AMAZING!!! All I can say is maybe you should sit down with your supervisor and discuss your needs, concerns, etc. You never know until you do. If you emphasize the positive aspects of what he/she is doing, communicate some of your needs and then end on a positive note, maybe you can both come to a middle ground where both of your needs are being met. I think you have some valid concerns, no one likes to be left in the dark where their job is concerned...I know you will make a good decision - whatever it is - you are in my prayers! ~Laura
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